Dear Conscience: What if we lived during “The Hunger Games?”

What if we lived during “The Hunger Games?”
Shoulder Devil: Jennifer M. HartsockShoulder Angel: Jill Mahler
If we lived during the “Hunger Games,” we’d have to care more about our own mortality than we would about other people’s wellbeing. Sure, Katniss saved her younger sister from a potential fate of brutal and inhumane death, but she probably only did it in order to gain some attention.

Think of it this way: why do the outer districts dislike the Hunger Games? It’s because the outer districts are poor and envious of the inner districts, and thus are not noble enough to consider their tributes as honorable. They’re too busy hunting and gathering and picking rocks out of their feet to reflect on the reason they’re apart of the Hunger Games in the first place. It’s their fault for not respecting authority and revolting against the Capitol.

And if you think this is a crazy idea, remember that, like Panem, man sinned, got kicked out of the Garden of Eden, and invited death into existence. Panem revolts against the Capitol, and death is the result. Instead of complaining about it, just deal with it. What makes it worse, it is young kids—or in view of the Garden of Eden, all of humanity—who are the ones who pay the price. Thanks a lot, we’re now left with your sloppy choices, and in constant worry about what comes after death. Eternal bliss, raging fire, or genetic-engineered mutations.

Alas, we have a strong, leading character who is only trying to win in order to keep her sister sane, and to stick it to the Man. Great, we’re teaching girls to stand up for themselves and be independent, abuse a poor guy’s heart in order to gain sponsors. Obviously she’s still in-love with the guy she dumped her family on to take care of. Pita-bread plus Katniss, the girl on fire equals toast.
What a… horrible world that would be. A place where “precious lives” are sacrificed as tributes. Can you only imagine?

Not that there wouldn’t be some population control from it. Then to make matters worse, everyone would be forced to watch the tributes fight to the death in arena. That is something missing from the Olympic games.

Fighting your fellow man and woman is the lowest mankind could ever stoup to. However, they say you never know what you’re made of till you have your back to the wall.

I mean, all they’d have to do is come from behind and … I mean, hug each other (please). How did Katniss win? She waited for them to come to her and for the right opportunity.

The patient hunter always gets their prey. But that was “wrong.” It would be better to die with dignity than take a life. (However, no one roots for the dead guy in action movies.)

Most people sleep easy since there’s no way we could even allow such a terrific… oops, horrific event to occur. History doesn’t repeat itself.

The ancient gladiators were a myth. We need not be careful. Our differences could easily be considered simple “misunderstandings.”

After all, one leader giving another world leader a lovely hug could easily avoid nuclear fallout and wars.

That’s the ticket; we need to arm our military with hugs. After all, that is how Katniss really won, because of “love.”

Psych, APRIL FOOL’S! Yikes, that was hard. A few times there I thought I was going to spontaneously explode, but I got you!

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1 Response

  1. Steven says:

    If the northwest was its own district, I imagine hunting animals and growing crops would be easy. The tricky part would be trying to find all that wonderful junk food that we students take for granted. In spite of what some may think, Butterfinger bars, Pringles, and Coca-Cola do have shelf lives. And scrounging would be made harder by Capital soldiers hoarding what’s left from the uprising.

What do you think?