dear conscience

Dear Conscience – Relationship Woes

A persistent young woman wants a shallow relationship with me, but I’m trying to leave that world behind. How do I tell her “no”?
Shoulder Devil: Ashley Christie Shoulder Angel: Justin Bolger
A younger woman wants use you and your body. Oh no, that sounds like a terrible problem. How awful for you.

Here’s what you do … let her. Don’t say “no”.

There is a finite window of time when the younger opposite sex will be attracted to you physically. Soon, they won’t be attracted to you at all. And in the way distant future they’ll only be attracted to your bank account.

You have to strike while the iron is hot my friend.

Do you know what the best thing is about attractive younger women? A short attention span. You’re the flavor of the month. Soon she’ll forget about you and move on the next guy. Then you will have missed your chance.

Plus, once she’s done with you, you’re free to move on to all of her hot young friends, because I know these girls and I know they always travel in packs.

You have the rest of your life to be all responsible and mature. Doing the “right” thing is only for the old and ugly. You’re young, she’s younger … have fun and getcha some!

Being used for your body will only waste your heart and your mind. This course of action will only lead to harm for both you and this young woman.

There is no choice but to let her down easy and be honest with your feelings.

You have an entire world before you. Start walking forward; move on from the rubble of your past. You’ve experienced the less mature before, and it’s left you unfulfilled thus far. Why would taking this old path lead somewhere new?

Strike out on this new venture, hero!

The best thing about a mature woman your age is that they are taking their time to find someone to care for and to be loved by. She will give you the time and interest you deserve as long as you’re willing to do the same for her.

When you find this woman, you will have everything you need in life. You’ll be a real team, a family.

You’ve just been having fun all your life, and someday you’ll want to redeem yourself and your honor. What better place than here? What better time than now?

Got Questions? We got answers.
We will be offering advice on ANY topic from two different points of view.
Send your questions to: commuter@linnbenton.edu

By Shoulder Angel & Shoulder Devil

Got questions? We got answers. Dear Conscience is a humorous advice column, and the Commuter's very own Shoulder Angel and Devil will offer advice on ANY topic. Send your questions to Commuter@LinnBenton.edu!

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